WHAT I WISH EVERY COUPLE WOULD DO ON THEIR WEDDING DAY
Some moments in life are so powerful they deserve more than just a passing glance. Your wedding day is one of those moments -- a rare and sacred threshold between everything you’ve been and everything you’re about to become. As someone who has witnessed (and photographed) countless love stories unfold, if I could whisper one thing into the hearts of every couple, it would be this: slow down. Let the day touch you. Let it be more than pretty flowers and perfect timelines. Let it be yours.
Here are the things I wish every couple would do on their wedding day -- not for anyone else, but for the two of you, for your hearts, your memories, and your future.
Write Each Other a Letter and Have It Delivered Before the Ceremony
There’s a quiet magic in words written by the one who knows you best. Before the ceremony, take the time to write each other a letter -- handwritten, vulnerable, honest. Speak to their soul. Tell them what today means to you, what you’re looking forward to, and maybe even what scares you a little. Then, have it delivered in a personal, symbolic way -- a groomsman carrying it to the bride, a bridesmaid to the groom, a treasured family member or small child. It’s a beautiful gesture of connection. Read these letters alone or during your First Look. Let their words steady you. Let them slow your racing heart and bring you home to each other before you step in front of the world.
Write a Letter Together to Your Future Children
In the quiet weeks leading up to your wedding, carve out space to sit together and write a letter to the children you may one day welcome. This isn’t about whether you’re sure or uncertain of becoming parents -- it’s about legacy. About love that echoes into the future.
Write to them about this day. About how much you love each other. About the promises you're making and the life you're beginning. Tell them what kind of home you hope to create, what values you want to raise them with, and how deeply you dreamed of their laughter. This letter becomes a gift -- not just for them, but for you, too. A beautiful reminder of your why.
Take a Moment During the Ceremony to Make Eye Contact With Your Guests
When you’ve walked down the aisle, and you’re standing in that sacred space of commitment -- pause. Take a breath. And look around. Really see them. Your friends. Your siblings. Your parents, teary-eyed and proud. Your chosen family. These are the people who have held you, shaped you, stood by you. Some have seen you at your worst. All are here to witness your best.
This is your circle. The ones who will cheer you on, cry with you, celebrate your babies, and help hold your marriage when it feels heavy. Let your heart feel the gravity of their presence. This is community. This is love, multiplied.
Take Time Together Immediately After the Ceremony
After the kiss, after the recessional, after the applause -- sneak away. Just the two of you. Before the cocktail hour, before the congratulations begin. This moment is often perfect for your wedding portraits, but it’s about more than just the photos. It’s about finding your center again. You’ve just stepped into a new chapter and it’s easy to get swept up in the celebration. Take five or ten minutes to hold hands. Cry. Laugh. Whisper, we did it. Feel your feet on the ground. Look into each other’s eyes. This sacred pause will stay with you long after the last song plays.
Step Back During the Reception and Just Watch
In the middle of the dancing and the clinking glasses, find a quiet spot with your spouse and simply observe. Watch your parents swaying. Your best friends laughing in a corner. The toddlers running across the dance floor. All of this joy, all of this warmth -- it exists because of your love. Because two people fell in love and chose to share that love with the world. Take that in. Let it fill your lungs. This is what love does. It gathers. It multiplies. It lights up a room.
Capture Your Feelings in Real Time With Selfies or Videos
Sure, you’ll have a professional videographer or photographer but your personal perspective is something they can’t capture. Take a few moments during the day to grab your phone and film a little video or snap a selfie. Talk about how you’re feeling. Whisper something sweet. Record your joy, your surprise, your awe. These raw, real snippets tell a story only you can tell. Later, create a keepsake video that strings these little treasures together. It’ll be imperfect, spontaneous, and completely priceless. A window back into what it felt like.
Go Somewhere Public in Your Wedding Attire
After the formalities, before the night ends, find somewhere off-script. A favorite coffee shop. Your first-date diner. A neighborhood 7-Eleven. Go as you are -- wedding gown, tux, veil, smiles. There’s something electric about being in the world, dressed in celebration. Strangers will smile at you, congratulate you, sometimes even clap. You’ll feel like you’re walking in a dream. And you are. This is real life. This is the start of your forever. And the ordinary backdrop -- the barista handing you your coffee, the laughter of people passing by -- will only make your joy feel more extraordinary.
Weddings are a swirl of beauty and motion, but at their core, they are a heartbeat. Yours. Together. So build a day that leaves you not just with photographs, but with feelings. Moments that anchor you. Glances and gestures that become memories. Write the letters. Steal the moments. Look around. Look at each other. This is the story you’ll tell forever. Make it unforgettable.
